Personal or Professional?

I have a friend who seems to enjoy a good old fashion argument more than most. Well, more than most, but just as about as much as I do. For years the perception has been that he's addicted to confrontation, he loves the rush of a good fight, he likes to "shake things up" .... but tonight it became obvious.

When your average employee engages in confrontation, seems to be part of more friction, or hell...seems to be defensive , that employee is looked down upon, seen as a risk, not a team player, or may even be a PIP candidate. That is unless the employee is a lawyer. Then (s)he's just doing the job.

So it became more and more obvious to me that it was impossible for us to understand my friend, and even more plausible that he was mostly misunderstood. Because let's face it, when you are in your mid thirties your career persona and your personal persona are someone blurred. And although your Mom told you you could be anyone you wanted to be, we all became the people we have become at work. If you dance on a pole for a living you're a whore, if you crunch numbers all day you're a dork, if you're a consultant everyone else can be doing it better with your help, and if you're a lawyer... well then you thrive on proving that you can win any argument whether it's a position you hold or wouldn't take unless the tape stopped rolling.

I've always held a kinship with this friend, and perhaps it wasn't just the social bond we share... Perhaps it's because a consultant always thinks they know better than the lawyer... who knows that whatever you think.. you're wrong.